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No. 16 - Song - Barry - "Me and Mrs. Brown."


Barry: Missis Brown's a wonder,
She's fifty-six or more,
You'd think that she was thirty
If you didn't know before;
She's such a one for scandal,
That's a thing in which she revels,
And when we two get together, why,
We're "perfect little devils!"
Oh! Missis Brown,
Wicked Missis Brown.
I recollect the stir she made
When first she came to town;
Heaps of secrets she has got,
And she'll tell you "all the lot"
If you come to tea with me
And Missis Brown!
  She loves to tell your fortune
By the tea-leaves in your cup:
And if she doesn't like you
I believe she makes it up!
She knows ev'rybody's income
And ev'rybody's past,
And she knows what Missis Tomlinson
Is going to call "her last!"
Oh! Missis Brown,
Shocking Missis Brown.
She hears ev'rything that's going to happen
In or out of town;
Do you know why Missis Smythe
Took that little place in Hythe?
You must come to tea with me
And Missis Brown!
  Missis Brown's a woman
With most persuasive pow'rs,
And once she starts to argue
She will talk to you for hours.
She thinks that Mister Chamberlain
Is only rolling logs,
And that thro' him, Notting Hill is simply
Going to the dogs!
Oh! Missis Brown,
Naughty Missis Brown.
She wrote to Mister Chamberlain
When he was up in town!
That she'd bet an even pound
We two girls could talk him round!
If he came to tea with me
And Missis Brown!
  A week ago last Sunday
A young man came to tea:
And ev'rybody noticed
He was quite épris with me.
So Missis Brown got furious
And made me feel so small;
By telling me that when he left,
He'd kiss'd her in the hall!
Oh! Missis Brown,
Cruel Missis Brown!
Of course I don't believe it,
But I feel so taken down:
If you think her story's true,
Well, the best thing you can do
Is to go and have a look at Missis Brown!
  You've heard of Lady Dash-dash
Dash-dash-dash-dash Oh! My!
And young Sir Charlie Dash-dash-dash,
He's always passing by.
He call'd the other evening,
And stayed for *** Oh! No!
Missis Brown says she thinks ***,
But that's a bit too far to go!
Oh! Missis Brown,
Dreadful Missis Brown!
She sent it to the Daily Mail
And got ten shillings down!
She will tell you all the facts,
In twelve scenes and seven acts,
If you come to tea with me
And Missis Brown!
  Missis Brown imagines
Her figure's very fine.
She told me quite in earnest
Hers was twice as good as mine!
It stung me to the quick
And since that day I've not forgot it;
For I know the figure that she's got,
And the shop at which she got it!
Oh! Missis Brown,
Bumptious Missis Brown!
Remember I have seen her in
Her little dressing gown.
If you think her figure's real,
Talk about a "skinny eel!"
Just you come to tea with me
And Missis Brown.

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