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British Musical Theatre   The Orchid

No. 1 - Opening Chorus - "The Horticultural College"

MIDI File

Chorus: This high horticultural college
Is formed with the excellent plan
Of giving young ladies the knowledge
That makes them the equal of man;
In gardens that have not been built on,
The pupils may practice their powers,
(Like Eve in the poem of Milton.)
In learning the culture of flowers!
This high horticultural college
Is formed with the excellent plan
Of giving young ladies the knowledge
That makes them the equal of man!
Ladies: It's paradise! Extremely nice!
What plants, and what bouquets too!
Gentlemen: It suits a mind that's quite refined,
And then, you know, it pays too!
Ladies: What stacks and sheaves
Of flowers and leaves,
What wealth of bud and blossom!
Gentlemen: Just see that rare cattleya there,
And that odontoglossum!
All: Oh, happy horticulture,
Though science, like a vulture,
May seem to ravage beauty
And scorn the artist's call;
Yes, beauty here and science
Are found in close alliance,
United in the duty that's horticultural!
Oh, happy horti, happy horti, horti, horticulture!
Here they come! Can't you hear?
Under palm-trees arching,
See the warden now appear
With the pupils marching!
Here they come! Can't you hear!
Pupils: Here we come on parade,
Just like some bold brigade,
Dark and short, fair and tall,
Highly horticultural!
In complete uniform
Which is neat, also warm,
It's the sort you would call
Highly horticultural!
All a-growing, and a-blowing too,
Lovely flowers, really ours,
Show what we can do!
All a-growing, taking, taut and trim,
If some Adam wants a madam,
Here's a chance for him.
All: All a-growing, and a-blowing too,
Beds and bowers full of flowers
Show what we can do!
All a-glowing, maidens fair to see,
I should chuckle, Honeysuckle,
If I were your bee!
Here they come, head by head,
Just like some crocus bed,
Swaying light on the stalk
By the gravel garden walk!
Roses fair look the girls;
Maiden hair waves and curls!
We'll report they are all
So very highly horticultural!

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