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British Musical Theatre   The Orchid

No. 12 - Song - Caroline and Chorus - "Advertisements."

MIDI File

Caroline: I was tired of living single
Never putting up the banns,
I'd a heart that longed to mingle
With a suitable young man's.
But my love remain'd internal,
In my heaving bosom pent,
Till I notice'd in a journal
Such a nice advertisement.
Well, it seems a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
He has ev'rything to make a wife content.
But this photographic art
Often leaves you in the carte
When the goods aren't up to the advertisement!
Chorus: Well, it seems a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
He has ev'rything to make a wife content.
But this photographic art
Often leaves you in the carte
When the goods aren't up to the advertisement!
   
Caroline: When they called it summer lately,
I was on a seaside trip,
And I wanted very greatly
To enjoy a quiet dip.
I'd a bathing dress of flannel,
And the folks that sold it said
I could swim across the Channel
And it wouldn't turn a thread.
Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
So I gaily put it on, and in I went.
But when I came out and dressed,
It was like a baby's vest,
Which was not quite nice as an advertisement!
Chorus: Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
So she gaily put it on, and in she went.
But when she came out and dressed,
It was like a baby's vest,
Which was not quite up to the advertisement!
   
Caroline: I was told that my complexion
Wasn't worthy of my face,
So I took it for correction
To a Beauty Doctor's place.
She massaged me with her knuckles,
Said my cheeks were very thin,
But her "Bloom of Honeysuckles"
Was the stuff for rubbing in!
Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
It was something soapy, with a pleasant scent.
It would clear my skin, she said,
But it cleared it off my head,
And she don't quote me in her advertisement!
Chorus: Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
It was something soapy, with a pleasant scent.
It would clear her skin, she said,
But it cleared it off her head,
And she don't quote her in her advertisement!
   
Caroline: I was walking out one morning
In a meditative mood,
When I saw a poster warning
Folks to take a patent food!
It was light and satisfying
Mixed with butter, jam or cream,
And you found that after trying
You could jump the widest stream!
Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
So a little fortune on that food I spent;
When I tried to take a leap
I went over in a heap,
And the boys said, Oh! what an advertisement!
Chorus: Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
So a little fortune on that food she spent;
When she tried to take a leap
She went over in a heap,
And the boys said, Oh! what an advertisement!
   
Caroline: There's a new straight-fronted corset
That is billed on ev'ry wall;
Fashion papers will endorse it
As the very best of all.
Well, I thought it was de rigueur
To avoid all embonpoint,
So I'd have the Yankee figure
With a sort of overhang!
Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
I was straight in front as far as all that went;
But I didn't bear in mind
How it made me look behind,
Like an air balloon with an advertisement!
Chorus: Well, it seemed a bit of all right,
Just a bit of all right.
She was straight in front as far as all that went;
But she didn't bear in mind
How it made her look behind,
Like an air balloon with an advertisement!

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