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No. 29 - Extra Song - Mrs. Hoppings - "Books"

MIDI File

Mrs. Hoppings: Never thought I'd live to see
Such a time as this is,
All my servants seem to me
Born to vex their Missis.
If you what to know what "Cook"
Does to earn her wages
Just you go downstairs and look,
There's "My lady" with a book,
Turning o'er the pages.
There she sits, a-reading on the fender,
Which must make things tender
For her poor old back.
I reminded her the kitchen's
Not the place for "Robert Hichens,"
And I've searched her box, and given her the sack.
There she sits, a-reading on the fender,
Which must make things tender
For her poor old back.
I reminded her the kitchen's
Not the place for "Robert Hichens,"
And I've searched her box, and given her the sack.

Missis Grudden fancies tracts,
"Charring's" her vocation,
I confess the way she acts
Fires my indignation.
"Do read this one, Mum," says she,
"Called the Tippler's warning."
"Thanks," I answered Missis G.
"If you come a-warning me,
You'll take yours this morning."
She's about as well informed on tippling,
As is Rudyard Kipling
Upon gen'ral facts,
And I'm sure that Missis Grudden
Must have changed her habits sudden,
But tomorrow morning off "My Lady" packs.
She's about as well informed on tippling,
As is Rudyard Kipling
Upon gen'ral facts,
And I'm sure that Missis Grudden
Must have changed her habits sudden,
But tomorrow morning off "My Lady" packs.

My last coachman went away
On account of marriage,
So the new man drove today —
'Twas the open carriage.
Off we went, a breakneck pace,
"Books," I says, well knowing.
When I told him not to race,
"Wait," says he, "I've lost my place."
So he has, he's going.
Oh! I gave him one with my umbrella,
And I says, "Young feller,
Now just you go slow.
Gracious me! We'll come a bowler,
If you sit there reading 'Zola'"—
For that's what it was, and now he's got to go.
Oh! I gave him one with my umbrella,
And I says, "Young feller,
Now just you go slow.
Gracious me! We'll come a bowler,
If you sit there reading 'Zola'"—
For that's what it was, and now he's got to go.

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