You are here: Archive Home > Curtain Raisers > After All > Web Opera
 
   
The Gilbert and Sullivan Archive  


After All

WEB OPERA


Dialogue Following Song No. 1


(Enter PENNYFATHER, L.)

PEN. You’ll excuse my keeping you waiting, sir, but the fact is —

SEL. Why, Pennyfather, old boy, don’t you know me?

PEN. Oh, of course, yes; how d’ye do? (Shaking hands.) I say, though — who are you?

SEL. Don’t you remember Harry Selworthy?

PEN. (putting on pince-nez) Why of course I do! (Shaking hands.) But — how much you’re altered! Ah, yes, of course — it’s the beard. Sit down, sit down; I’ve very glad to see you, very glad indeed. (SEL. sits C. PEN. stands R., regarding him.) And what have you been doing with yourself since I saw you?

SEL. You know I left England intending to invest that legacy of mine in cattle-farming in America.

PEN. And did you do so? (Sitting R. of table.)

SEL. (with assumed indifference). Yes. Went into partnership with a Western man; I found the capital, he the experience.

PEN. And how did you get on?

SEL. Oh, the old story. In six months he had the capital and I had the experience.

PEN. Dear me! What did you do next?

SEL. Bought a toothbrush and a revolver, and went down to Texas.

PEN. What did you do there?

SEL. The first thing I did was to shoot a sheriff. People were so delighted with my spirit of enterprise, that they offered me his berth.

PEN. Do you take it?

SEL. No. Played euchre same night with a silver-miner, my toothbrush against his boots; won his boots. Played him toothbrush and boots against his shirt; won that. Played him toothbrush, boots, and shirt against his braces; won again. Played toothbrush, boots, shirt and braces against his —

PEN. (looking round). S-s-s-h!

SEL. Well, I won the entire outfit.

PEN. What did you do then?

SEL. Crossed over the Rio Grande into Mexico. They were getting up a Revolution there, and, as I had two shirts, they made me Governor.

PEN. Did you govern long?

SEL. No. I collected the revenues as quickly as possible, and abdicated one night 20 September, 2007 took ship for England, and — here I am!

PEN. Well, after doing all that, I dare say you’d like a brandy and soda. (Going to bell on table, back of R.C.)

SEL. I shouldn’t mind. And what have you been doing?

PEN. Oh, the old drudgery. (Rings.)

SEL. Ah, you business-men always grumble at your professions, but I know you really love them.

PEN. We’re obliged to stick to them; but there’s no love lost between us. It’s just like — but you know the ordinary routine of a solicitor’s existence? (Returning, and coming forward, R.C.)

SEL. Not in the least. (Rising)

PEN. Then allow me to inform you.

Previous Page Previous Song Opera Home Next Song Next Page

Page modified 20 September, 2007 Copyright © 2007 The Gilbert and Sullivan Archive All Rights Reserved