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No. 2: Song (Woodpecker)
To MIDI File

Woodpecker.
  Maria is simple and chaste —
    She's pretty and tender and modest —
  But on one or two matters of taste
    Her views are distinctly the oddest.
  Her virtue is something sublime —
    No kissing — on that there's a stopper —
  When I try, she says "All in good time —
    At present it's highly improper,
Improper, it's strictly improper."
      Such virtue heroic I call,
        To complain were the act of a noodle
      She's allowed to kiss no one at all
        But her cousin — her cousin, young Foodle.
      Such virtue heroic I call,
        To complain were the act of a noodle
      She's allowed to kiss no one at all
        But her cousin, young Foodle, Foodle.

  Now a maiden could never offend
    By embracing her father or brother;
  But I never could quite comprehend
    Why cousins should kiss one another.
  Of course it's an innocent whim —
    Beneath it no mischief is hidden.
  But why is that given to him
    Which to me is so strictly forbidden,
Forbidden, so strictly forbidden?
      It's as innocent as it can be;
        He's a kind of performing French poodle,
      But why withhold kisses from me
        Which are freely accorded to Foodle?
      It's as innocent as it can be;
        He's a kind of performing French poodle,
      But why withhold kisses from me
        Which are freely accorded to Foodle?
       
  Foodle,
Foodle,
Noodle,
Foodle,
Poodle,
      Why withhold kisses from me
        Which are freely accorded to Foodle?

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