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No. 22: Song (Bunn, with Susan)

Music by Edward German

MIDI File MIDI File [17KB, 2' 38"]

Oh, the age in which we're living strikes a man of any sense
As an age of make-believe and imitation and pretence:
And it's gradually growing more impossible to see
The difference between what people are and seem to be!
Our ladies grow more youthful now, the longer they're alive,
And reduce their ages annually, after thirty-five;
But for such miscalculations they will always make amends
By liberally adding to the ages of their friends,
Susan and Bunn.
By liberally adding to the ages of their friends.
And if Aesop wrote his fables
In the present year of grace,
He perhaps would turn the tables
On the tortoise in the race:
For which goes quicker on ahead, and stays the faster there,
The imitation tortoiseshell or imitation hair?

There's the vulgar imitation of a true philanthropist
Who sends a hundred thousand - to be published in a list -
Which purchases a title (as he possibly intends),
With an imitation coat of arms, and imitation friends.
Then his wife - a charming lady with an imitation blush -
Will hold a big reception, where Society will rush
To see her imitation of a Duchess, in the style
Of her imitation welcomes with an imitation smile!
Susan and Bunn.
Of her imitation welcomes with an imitation smile!
But a bona fide Duchess
Will endeavour to forget
The aggravating clutches
Of eternal etiquette
By assisting at an imitation charity bazaar
As an imitation barmaid in an imitation bar!

Now the passage to a Drawing Room's a matter for alarms,
Where the elbows of the Dowagers mean passages of arms,
For ladies (not of slim age) love to push and fight and scratch,
To imitate a scrimmage in a Rugby football match!
But if noble women do forget they're noble, now and then,
There are plenty of young ladies who behave as gentlemen -
There's the tailor maid, who imitates the cheeriest of chaps,
(And owes a pretty figure to her tailor too, perhaps,)
Susan and Bunn.
(And owes a pretty figure to her tailor too, perhaps,)
While silly servant maidies
Dress in imitation silk,
And think they look like ladies
When they're taking in the milk -
But though they take the milk in, that's the only thing they do,
And the milk takes them in sometimes, being imitation too!

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