Utopia Limited

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Dialogue following No. 13


Enter King dressed as Field-Marshal.

King: To a Monarch who has been accustomed to the uncontrolled use of his limbs, the costume of a British Field-Marshal is, perhaps, at first, a little cramping. Are you sure that this is all right? It's not a practical joke, is it? No one has a keener sense of humour than I have, but the First Statutory Cabinet Council of Utopia Limited must be conducted with dignity and impressiveness. Now, where are the other five who signed the Articles of Association?

Fitzbattleaxe: Sir, they are here.

Enter Lord Dramaleigh, Captain Corcoran, Sir Bailey Barre, Mr. Blushington, and Mr. Goldbury from different entrances.

King: Oh! (addressing them) Gentlemen, our daughter holds her first Drawing-Room in half an hour, and we shall have time to make our half-yearly report in the interval. I am necessarily unfamiliar with the forms of an English Cabinet Council — perhaps the Lord Chamberlain will kindly put us in the way of doing the thing properly, and with due regard to the solemnity of the occasion.

Lord Dramaleigh: Certainly — nothing simpler. Kindly bring your chairs forward — His Majesty will, of course, preside.

They range their chairs across stage like Christy Minstrels. King sits centre, Lord Dramaleigh on his left, Mr. Goldbury on his right, Captain Corcoran left of Lord Dramaleigh, Captain Fitzbattleaxe right of Mr. Goldbury, Mr. Blushington extreme right, Sir Bailey Barre extreme left.)

King: Like this?

Lord Dramaleigh: Like this.

King: We take your word for it that this is all right. You are not making fun of us? This is in accordance with the practice at the Court of St. James's?

Lord Dramaleigh: Well, it is in accordance with the practice at the Court of St. James's Hall.

King: Oh! it seems odd, but never mind.

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