The Yeomen of the Guard


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No. 1a: SONG (Wilfred)

"When jealous torments rack my soul"
(Cut Song)
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Kenneth Sandford as Wilfred c. 1960
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Wilfred.
 

When jealous torments rack my soul,
My agonies I can't control,
Oh, better sit on red hot coal
Than love a heartless jade.

The red hot coal will hurt no doubt,
But red hot coals in time die out,
But jealousy you cannot rout,
Its fires will never fade.

It's much less painful on the whole
To go and sit on red hot coal
      'Til you're completely flayed,
Or ask a kindly friend to crack
Your wretched bones upon the rack
      Than love a heartless jade,
      Than love a heartless jade.


 

The kerchief on your neck of snow
I look on as a deadly foe,
It goeth where I dare not go
And stops there all day long.

The belt that holds you in its grasp
Is, to my peace of mind, a rasp,
It claspeth what I can not clasp,
Correct me if I'm wrong.

It's much less painful on the whole
To go and sit on red hot coal
      'Til you're completely flayed,
Or ask a kindly friend to crack
Your wretched bones upon the rack
      Than love a heartless jade,
      Than love a heartless jade.

* * * * * *

The bird that breakfasts on your lip,
I would I had him in my grip,
He sippeth where I dare not sip,
      I can't get over that.

The cat you fondle, soft and sly,
He lieth where I dare not lie.
We're not on terms, that cat and I.
      I do not like that cat.

It's much less painful on the whole
To go and sit on red hot coal
      'Til you're completely flayed,
Or ask a kindly friend to crack
Your wretched bones upon the rack
      Than love a heartless jade,
      Than love a heartless jade.

Or ask a kindly friend to crack
Your wretched bones upon the rack
      Than love a heartless jade!

Exit Wilfred.

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