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| No. 13: Song (Maguire with Chorus) | |
| MIDI File [32Kb,3' 27"] | |
| Maguire. | ||||||
| If you value a peaceable life, | ||||||
| This maxim will teach you to get it: | ||||||
| In all things give into your wife, — | ||||||
| I didn't — I lived to regret it. | ||||||
| My wife liked to govern alone, | ||||||
| And she never would share with another; | ||||||
| Remarkably tall and well grown, She had plenty of muscle and bone, With an excellent will of her own — |
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| And my darling takes after her mother! | ||||||
| Oh, if early in life | ||||||
| I had happily known | ||||||
| How to humour a wife | ||||||
| With a will of her own, | ||||||
| We should not have been snarling | ||||||
| All day at each other — | ||||||
| And, remember, my darling | ||||||
| Takes after her mother! | ||||||
| Chorus. | ||||||
| Oh, if early in life | ||||||
| He had happily known | ||||||
| How to humour a wife | ||||||
| With a will of her own, | ||||||
| They would not have been snarling | ||||||
| All day at each other — | ||||||
| And, remember, his darling | ||||||
| Takes after her mother! | ||||||
| Maguire. | ||||||
| Never wake up her temper, — I did — | ||||||
| And smash went a window, instanter; | ||||||
| Invariably do as you're bid, — | ||||||
| I didn't — bang went a decanter. | ||||||
| Give in to each whim, — I declined — | ||||||
| At my head went a vinegar-cruet. | ||||||
| Whatever inducement you find, Never give her advice of a kind That is known as "a bit of your mind," — |
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| I did — and the crockery knew it! | ||||||
| Oh, if early in life | ||||||
| I had happily known | ||||||
| How to humour a wife | ||||||
| With a will of her own, | ||||||
| We should not have been snarling | ||||||
| All day at each other — | ||||||
| And, remember, my darling | ||||||
| Takes after her mother! | ||||||
| Chorus. | ||||||
| Oh, if early in life | ||||||
| He had happily known | ||||||
| How to humour a wife | ||||||
| With a will of her own, | ||||||
| They would not have been snarling | ||||||
| All day at each other — | ||||||
| And, remember, his darling | ||||||
| Takes after her mother! | ||||||
| Maguire. | ||||||
| Though her aspect was modest and meek, | ||||||
| She could turn on the steam in a minute: | ||||||
| Her eruptions went on for a week — | ||||||
| Vesuvius, my boy, wasn't in it. | ||||||
| Give your wife of indulgence her fill, | ||||||
| Though your meals be unpleasantly scrappy — | ||||||
| Never look at her milliner's bill; Gulp down that extravagant pill, And you may, and probably will, |
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| Be bankrupt — and thoroughly happy! | ||||||
| Oh, if early in life | ||||||
| I had happily known | ||||||
| How to humour a wife | ||||||
| With a will of her own, | ||||||
| We should not have been snarling | ||||||
| All day at each other — | ||||||
| And, remember, my darling | ||||||
| Takes after her mother! | ||||||
| Chorus. | ||||||
| Oh, if early in life | ||||||
| He had happily known | ||||||
| How to humour a wife | ||||||
| With a will of her own, | ||||||
| They would not have been snarling | ||||||
| All day at each other — | ||||||
| And, remember, his darling | ||||||
| Takes after her mother! | ||||||
Wedding party all dance off.
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Page modified 21 June 2010
